@elephant

Ahh, you are in an angels-mood today, so ladylike. We will see how long it lasts this time.

I know you like the number 7 very much. And ohh yes your lil doggy Toto is so worth to be loved. I know animals are your best friends, I know you look never back and a new day is a new beginning, I know your mood can change often within a day within a moment, I know you think you have a pure heart … so I could tell things in a row wich you have in common to your sister.
You said it is because you are twins? Forget it, you are just a twin of yourself. We will never see what is in your pants in real, so you are free to say whatever you like. We both know how good you can pretend to be a man, right Athina? Or were the photos of yourself and your dog wich you showed me only photos of someone else? Or wasn´t only one person talking with me all the time but you and your brother and maybe also your sistertheatheist and a brother who will marry next time…and and and!?

Btw I´m not lesbian. We started to talk to each other, when you used to call yourself James and of course I thought you are a man, but maybe its your surname?! very unusual for a greek one (or a spain, chinese…hmmm let me thought…finnish…and so on and on) but okay, who knows!
Anyway, we shared our craziness, fun, interests, dreams, thoughts, feelings, darkest sides, freedom … – only based on the power of words -so it´s not about sex and the gender is not the point. I loved your spirit, your heart and soul. When you admited you are a woman my love for you was not gone, though I had never before any romantic relationship to a woman. I never expected I would meet here someone who is so close to me. And I never thought I could feel such deep for someone I never met face to face. I came not to this side to find love, not at all. I was a very happy person living as a single for a long time. But LOVE JUST HAPPEN. You made it not easy for me with all the fights, on and offs and tears we had, mostly because you thought I was someone else and when your insecurity let you doubt again and again. And exactly like you act with me you act with True now.
It´s exactly the same story!!!
Is it every year someone else you fell in love with? I remember you mentioned a Rita/Margarita – do you loved her in 2010 like me in 2011 and like True in 2012? Or at least you had pretend it.

I don´t blame you for that. You know, all what we need is love and the lack of love or if we are feeling lonely, sometimes more sometimes less, let us do things we can´t even explain to ourselves.

I know, I hurt you so much when I left you on 09/23/2011 and lost your trust for good. You know, I tried to explain the reasons. And as I said – I don´t know how often – I wasn´t here for a long time. (So I can´t be the one who was warned you about True as you said btw)
But then I read here your love confession on 09/13/2012 (alias: justaboydreamer). I was happy because I thought I got you back in my live. When you lost someone you loved and this someone come back to you then this love will stay forever. But this works only when the love of both is really true, right? At least my love for you was it.

After all what I´ve read here in the last time I don´t know why this love declaration from you to me.
Only to leave me after to say me again I´m playing games here by being True although you know my weak in english esp grammar (and True´s english is pretty good)?
After a new discussion about god although you knew it from the beginning how I stand to god?
And after to freak out again because I didn´t want to change my twitter-ava wich you didn´t like at all?
Only to say I have mistaken you and I´m a silly stupid dreamer to believe you could actually love me?
And all this only to play with my feelings in order to hurt me back??? And you knew that I wasn´t in a good state at this time, so that you had to know it must even harder for me.

It seems you wasn´t focus on us but only focus on to find out what games I could play. But it´s only in your mind and not the reality, what a waste of time and energy. In fact those people who do bad things by theirselves think other people do the same bad things and that´s why they have such a big mistrust.

Btw I don´t want answers from you to all the questions. I wouldn´t believe you anyway, my faith in you is gone.

I could say much more -a novel- but actually I don´t wanted to say so much and I will come to an end finally.
I don´t regret anything no matter if you fool me or not. It was amazing to have the feeling to meet a close friend and a soulmate. I had the beautiful feeling of loving someone and to be loved and the unique feeling of to be free together. And this and only this will always be in my heart. And last but not least I learned a lot.

And Athina, do yourself a favour and just be who you really are, no more, no less. I know all the stories you tell you need to express yourself. But let it be to test someone with your confusing actions. That´s not a good base for confidence and security.

p.s. if someone will read a comment with the alias Beaty or so and it´s not this official account then it´s not me!

I have to go at the moment, will you be about later, to continue this, or would another day suit better ?

I’m sure. Hit me with YOUR truth woman I can handle all in this world apart from living.

”invested … to put something in to a relationship, hoping that it will be recipricated”

AHAHHA..HA!!

Got you now good you LIAR!!

You said so yourself, that to love someone TRULY love them, it means that you never EVER want from them to love you BACK!!

Isn’t that right or you’ve changed your mind again?!

”are you really ?”

you’ll never hear from me again.

Sometime hate is not enough….

I never believed that James could be JL.
I´m not such a naive, obsessed fan-girly and I wasn´t never one btw.
I´m a very grown woman with a puberty son. I have a crazy and childish side, but not in a bad way. And I´m a dreamer for sure and have my head in the clouds sometimes. But I´m grounded enough not to dream about to catch some attention of a famous person, still less to get any communication with him. Do you actually think, I would have the personal and deep conversations between us mistaken for conversations between me and JL and fall in love with him??? Wow you must really think that I´m that stupid.

I think he isn´t here, too busy for it. I also think he don´t post all the things by himself because lack of time. His team does many things for him too. Perhaps he comes here to read something and he could be crazy enough to post something here. But non famous people would ever post such personal things at an official side. It´s an usual codex and they do all to protect their private life. Well JL is a person who shares a lot about his life.

Maybe it´s one of the reasons why so many here thinks they would talk with him. I don´t know.
I didn´t even expect it, that here is such a obsession and it didn´t comes in my mind that here would be such a mess and chaos. Would I have knew it, I wouldn´t have post some things.

What I mean is that what you let believe I would think James is JL.
You said that you don´t know why so many here think that you are him.
I know you didn´t say something directly about to be him. But some things you talked about could fit to him too or at least let open a play space that could filled by the fantasy of other ppls. I don´t know if you can understand what I mean. Do you remember that I didn´t understand at the beginning why you was so shy and often spoke not so open and clear but more indirectly. It seemed so misterious, that I began to wonder after a while and I got insecure what was going on. I hought you could to play a bad game with me by pretending to be him – as I said not in a direct way but in a hidden way, it was only an appearance. And to find out what is hidden behind that I began to talk like I would think James=JL. Beside this I knew your playfull nature, you remember your talking to yourself (Sophie). I wanted to see how you react when I play the same game.
I know it was childish and a big mistake. At that point I was stupid. I had should ask you directly. I don´t know what let me doing this, maybe my also playfull nature or my general mistrust toward social contacts in the net. You know you was the first one who I was chatting with at all.

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After some weeks James told me to be a woman and to use this name + a male identity to protect herself. I understand and believed it. She showed me few pics of her and her dog too.
And Athina was the one who couldn´t believe that I´m not thinking she is JL and tested me (email: „I´m a rockstar ….). A few times I thought even she could think I´m JL! My, what a mess.
And I didn´t left James suddenly when it comes out that he is a she. We had a lot of on and offs caused by all the confusions here with other persons.

@Elephant, what time was it when you had to leave me or when I left you suddenly and ignored you for month? September last year or when do you mean?
And that is the question of all: If you are not James/Athina who are you then?
I started to talked with James here and only with him. So I have to wonder if there are more James than you.
Or is Athina really your sister and/or was she taken your identity to continue the conversation with me instead of you? Or did you both use the same alias? Or ist someone else?
Did you wanted to play a game with me because you thought I would think I´m talking with JL?
I don´t want to blame anyone. I want to know only the thruth.

I remember that I thought few times there could be more than one James.
One time I read a comment of James that he came back from a holiday after many weeks and didn´t know what was going on here in the meanwhile. I thought it´s another James who thought someone used his name. James is a very often used name, right?

And I had often the feeling Athina is two persons in one but I thought its a part of her personality and I loved her though. All what I shared with James/Athina here or via mail and twitter about my life and my feelings was nothing but the truth. I didn´t pretend to have all the feelings I talked about. They was pure reality. I was surprised of myself that I could feel so deeply this way, without to met the person in real life. It was surreal but I couldn´t do anything against my feelings. They just happened. I know that James told me one time not to believe in soulmate. But after that he told me more than once to love me. But also often he treat my like shit because he wanted that I leave him. And I left him but I still felt love, missed him and thought he still loved me too so that I came back every time. And I thought Athina was glad that I did it, at least she told me so. But then something very bad happened to my son and I was out of order for a long time. The rest I´ve said already.

Because I wasn´t here for long I can´t know what all was going on here. What I know is that this summer I wrote an email to Athina again because I thought she could be elephant and she was asking me if I am True. But I couldn´t stay with her because of my own messed mind about all what happended. Then I´ve read the comment of Justaboydreamer and Athina. I thought I could come together with her again. And when she left me again I thought she was playing a game with me to hurt me back. When I saw the comments of Wideawake I thought it sounds like Athina. And then I worried about True and that someone COULD play the same game with her.
So thats MY whole truth. May someone enlighten me.

p.s. I will be here again tomorrow in case someone is interested in.